I'm in the mood to post things that have been sitting on google docs for too long. So here's some original fiction. In some ways it's a bit different than my usual stuff (there's some intentional lack of capitalization and it's second person - both of those are things I didn't think I'd ever experiment with), but I hope you like it.

he pushes you against a stadium wall (on the shaded side, but the cement still feels hot through your robes) and kisses you; you hope that none of the people standing around you are anybody you know, but kiss him back anyway. you both taste like salt from spending three and a half hours sweating in the sun until you soak through your black graduation robes. his beard scrapes your sunburned cheeks and it hurts. you still can't find it in you to push him away.

he finally pulls away and smiles down at you, but you can't bring yourself to smile back so you avoid his eyes.

this isn't how goodbyes are supposed to go.

actually, this goodbye wasn't suppose to go at all. he was supposed to catch your eye and wave (which he did), maybe come over and give you an awkward hug while he asks if you found a job (he did that too). then you were supposed to wait in the heat for your names to be called and maybe he'd look back at you a couple times (he did that more than a couple times, but you still felt like everything was going according to plan). this kind of elaborate farewell was really supposed to be avoided.

he gives up on the smiling when you don't say anything and steps back, shuffling his feet. later, he says.

he is mad because your face tells him there won't be a later. you stare at his back as he walks away and remember group work (footsies) and declined invitations to Chinese food after class (i've got too much stuff to work on without maybe another time tacked on at the end).

it takes you four years to realize that the one of the only difference between high school and college was that the he's have changed (and occasionally owned real estate). The excuses and the regrets and the goodbyes all feel the same.


There might be more randomness to come. I am ahead in my lesson planning for once, so I'm trying to take advantage.
falulatonks: (Default)

From: [personal profile] falulatonks

For some reason this feels a lot more different to me than it did when you sent it to me...a long time ago. It's still gorgeous, of course, but it is kind of emotionally overwhelming in a way that I am not describing right, at all.

The beginning and the paragraph on how goodbye was supposed to go are two of my favourite things from anything I have ever read by you. ♥ Love it.

From: [identity profile] cold-campbells.livejournal.com

Well thank you. Now that my post-collegiate emotions are ...more separated from this, I guess, my sentiments towards it are less emotional. But I can better appreciate it from an aesthetic stand point, and sort of agree that those are two of my favorite things that I've written too.

From: [identity profile] wonder149.livejournal.com

i...like this. maybe partly because it complements my reflective mood lately. anyway, yes. i like this a lot. do share more :)


cold_campbells: (Default)

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